Friday, January 27, 2006
The Mid-Life Crisis Continues
These Vitamins claim to fight the SEVEN signs of aging. SEVEN?? I had no idea that there were seven signs. What are these seven signs? They don't say on the package so I will have to guess. Okay, let's see. Sagging, discoloration (blotches, age spots, rosacea), wrinkles. That's three. Or, do they count the discoloration sub-categories as three separate line items? Would creases be the same as wrinkles? Fine lines? This so confusing! As I ponder this, I must be careful not to scrunch up my forehead and create more signs! Well, I will have to write the company and ask what the seven signs are. Because now, I must know.
Why must I know? So that I can determine whether I have all of the signs. Then, and only then, can I mount an effective multi-pronged approach to fight those signs. What these prongs will be, I do not yet know. But make no mistake, loyal readers, I will get some prongs and I will fight ALL SEVEN SIGNS. It would be a pity to fight only five or six of them, leaving the one or two unfought signs behind to tell their dreadful tale.