Saturday, March 17, 2007

Saturday & A Little Meg & Kate Update (Written Saturday Night)

Good evening, Loyal Readers. Your BloomingtonGirl writes to you from her TempurPedic bed, snug under the covers, relaxing after a pleasant day.

Chris is working this weekend, so Jack and I are on our own, as we have been all week. This morning, Jack and I had a delicious breakfast, practiced piano, went to the Y, where Jack played in the childcare room while I worked off (in advance) the cocktails and snacks I would consume later at my friend Jenny's house. And, now that it is much later and I have, as planned, consumed cocktails and snacks at my friend Jenny's house, I can say that my consumption calories most certainly exceeded my previously expended calories. Alas, life is like that sometimes.

And, now some serious musing:

This is a picture from several months ago of Jack and Betsy in the bathtub. Someday, Betsy will be completely grossed out that she bathed with her uncle, but for now, it is really sweet. This picture has little to do with what follows, other than it is a picture of two little tykes in our happy family.

And, this is a picture of Meg taken last summer. While it isn't the very best picture I have of her, it shows how happy she is. And, that does relate to what follows.

Yesterday, Jack and I met Meg and her husband Abram and their daughter Betsy in at the Children's Museum in Indianapolis. We had a wonderful time. Meg and Abram have really made their marriage work despite getting married so young and having a baby right away. They are committed to each other, respectful of each other and have a great time together. Both are loving and effective parents to Betsy, who is completely adorable and smart and healthy and well adjusted socially. Meg is going to school part-time to get a nursing degree, working part-time at the Y in child care (where she can bring Betsy with her) and is keeping a nice house and cooking for her family. Her energy level is impressive and she is happier than I have ever seen her. Abram is working for the city of Kokomo (where they live) in a job that he really likes and on the side, he is setting up his own business doing guitar repair and building custom guitars. I had such concerns about them getting married and having a baby so young, but clearly, my fears were not realized. I am delighted to have been wrong.

This is a picture of Kate and Jack taken last fall in New York. Jack loves his sisters and they adore him. Aren't we so lucky?

Kate is working as a paralegal for a big deal law firm in NYC and has become appropriately disillusioned about the practice of law. She has decided not to go to law school at this point and is probably going to go back into science. Kate lives in Manhattan with her boyfriend of many years, Phil. As most of my loyal readers know, I adore him and I completely respect the relationship they have. I was always of the mind that Kate and Meg should get married when they were older and "make it on their own" first. But, in Meg's case, I can see that for her, getting married very young is working very well for her; indeed it was probably the best thing for her. And, in Kate's case, if she were to choose to marry Phil at age 23, I would give her my blessing.

One of the unexpected gifts of being a parent - I specifically am referring to being a step-parent to Kate and Meg - is that I have had the experience of thinking I know what is right for them only to find out (fighting it all the way) that I was completely wrong or that there were other paths they could choose that were just as good for them. (Don't get me wrong. I have been right LOTS of times.) But, the process of having to change my mind and admit that I was wrong - even if it is just to myself - has enabled me to be (very comfortably) less certain about lots of things. (What I mean is that I realize that I can't know what is right for someone else and that I don't have to be right or worry about what someone else should or shouldn't do.)

This is as rambling a post as I have written in some time and I apologize. But, I am touching on a theme that I will put aside to develop more fully because it has been such a powerful letting-go tool in my life.

And, I didn't even realize it until right now. Who knew that Kate and Meg could teach me so much without even trying?

1 comment:

Perk said...

Life is full of surprises. Usually when we least expect them. Thank goodness.